A Letter Ungiven
by teawithmugi
Summary: Ayano's pride has always stopped her from admitting her love to Kyouko. This time she decides to take a chance. Was it truly the best thing to do, though?


Ayano was awake the whole night thinking of what to say and what to do. The day before she hadn't slept, too, wondering if confessing to Kyouko was a good idea at all. It was hard to be sure. She kept thinking, at home, on her way to school, at classes, at the council and on her bed. And finally she decided to stop thinking and just do it.

She wrote sweet words on a flowery paper. Such words didn't come easily, but they held all her feelings. Letters are so old-fashioned, but Ayano knew no other way. She knew that if she were to voice what she feels she would stutter and crumble.

The next day Ayano went to school with the letter in hands, as she would not dare to store it in her backpack. What if it got crumpled? No, everything must be perfect.

In class, they sat too far from each other, so all Ayano could do was wait. And as she waited she stared at Kyouko, so pretty with her golden hair. Yes, golden hair, that's nice, I should have put that on my letter, she thought. She considered all the things she could have written, as there was so much she liked about Kyouko.

Kyouko turned to her and smiled. Such a goofy smile, Ayano should not love it so much, and yet she did. She couldn't help but flimsily smile back. Soon she noticed that she had wasted her day thinking of Kyouko: she hadn't taken any notes and could hardly remember what the teachers had said. No. Not wasted.

As the classes neared their end, Ayano started gathering her courage. Admitting it to herself had been hard enough. Her legs trembled, and she knew it would be difficult to simply stand up. Then they were dismissed. Ayano took a deep breath and got up.

- Toshinou Kyouko! – She meant to yell, but her voice came out so thin, so frail. Kyouko simply left the classroom with Yui at her side.

Give up, Ayano told herself, it seemed the wisest choice, but she was already running towards Kyouko. The corridors were so crowded now, and it was not proper for the vice president of the student council to push students, so she couldn't reach Kyouko.

And everybody wanted to talk to her. The music club needs a new drum. The theater club got a new member and can finally stage a play for the school festival. That's all fine, she wanted to say, now get out of my way. She said nothing. When she finally finished her duties, so much time had passed. The students were either home or at the clubs.

Ayano looked at the letter. She didn't have any heart stickers to put on it, so instead she drew some. It didn't look that pretty, but it seemed to make it special. Kyouko would surely be at the entertainment club, possibly sleeping or molesting Chinatsu. Ayano knew what to do now, she knew the words. And so she filled herself with confidence and went to meet Kyouko.

On the way Ayano found Sakurako and that red haired girl who was always with Kyouko, whoever she was. They were both giggling like idiots, as they often were.

- Oh, vice president! – Sakurako said, laughing as she spoke. – I bet you must be going to berate Kyouko for whatever she has done now.

- N-not really. Not this time.

- That's unusual! – The red haired girl said. – Even so, you should wait a bit. Kyouko's kind of busy right now, you know, – they both giggled – kissing Yui. Chinatsu's so angry, you have no idea!

Ayano's eyes widened for a moment and she let out a loud gasp.

- Eh? What's wrong?

- Nothing. Nothing, really.

Quickly she turned away. Not tears, not now, she bit her lip to stop them.

- If she's busy, then I'll talk to her later – Ayano blurted out, and she stormed away.

Don't cry. Don't cry. But it's so hard not to. She could barely breathe. As she ran to the student council room she kept her head down so no one could see the tears. Please be empty, please, she said as she opened the door.

It was empty. She locked the door, sat in a corner, closed her eyes and let herself cry as much as she wanted. Her shirt was wet now, as was her face, and so was the cold floor.

She knew she shouldn't have been so crushed. She should have expected something to go wrong. And yet it hurt so much. Then she opened her eyes and she saw the room wasn't empty.

- P-president?

Rise just stared blankly for an awkward moment that lasted far too long. Ayano tried to hold the tears, and wiped them off her face. Wordlessly, Rise got up and sat next to the crying girl. She held Ayano's hand softly, and didn't seem to mind that it was so wet. Then Ayano started sobbing again, louder and louder. Rise said something, but Ayano could not hear her. Her weeping was louder.

Ayano was awake the whole night thinking how to survive the next day. Thinking how to pretend everything was alright, how to look Kyouko in the face without revealing any sadness. Would it hurt to keep talking to her, keep being friends? She hoped not, but she doubted it. Just act normally, she kept telling herself endlessly, and pretend things are the same as usual.

- Toshinou Kyouko!

Despite the impulse to cry, she sounded the same as usual. No one noticed something was wrong. The one person who knew would never say anything. Everything was normal. Yet it hurt.

* * *

><p><em>Writing a serious story about Yuru Yuri kind of feels like missing the point, but I liked the end result. Anyway, I don't usually write romance so any comments and criticism would be wonderful!<em>


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